Marrying a divorcee? something to note..

These days.. the divorce rate is going up.. and many discussions/debates have sprouted.. to set the record i'm a divorcee myself.. and a couple of my friends too.. Learning from my own experiences and from my friends, i've learned a no of things abt divorcing, being & marrying a divorcee, relationships and life in itself.

Today, i wished to share something abt life living with a divorcee.. i know John (not his real name) for many years. He got divorced abt 4 yrs ago after more than 8 yrs with her (first wife). Their reason for going separate ways were mainly due to maturity, realization & differences.. wat do i mean? well,.. they met when they were young - abt 24 for him & she's 19.. then both started to work and simply grew further apart.. before the differences - in hobbies, thoughts, likes & dislikes - makes them almost impossible to stay together.. however, afterall, they were once together for eight years! That's a long time.. Then John a year ago met Mary and they got married recently.. Though they have disagreement, they were able to share common interests, thoughts and John felt that she's the one for a long-term relationship. Then one day, while seeing a Doc & registering names, he accidentally wrote his first wife name.. and not Mary!! Mary was very sad and disappointed.. John was surprised at his own folly and started to reflect why that happened.. When i asked John did he still miss or love his first wife so much that he wrote her name, he answered that he no longer misses or loves her. He, however, said that perhaps being with her for over eight years, as a habitual thing, he unconsciously wrote her name.. He promised he will make sure never to make such a mistake again! It was a painful lessons for both of them.. coz he now has to work extra hard to assure Mary of his love..

So, what's the lesson learned here? Things like these will happen.. never say never.. so, if u're with a divorcee.. be prepared! i'm not saying to accept whatever happens. i'm just stating a fact. If u're the divorcee, be present! Dont let yr mind wonder off and yr unconscousness take over every often.. ;-)

It really takes much more understanding and maturity to deal with a relationship involving a divorcee. The same the other way round. But the effort may be well worth it - for love.. ;-)